Age Level: 10 to 12

Activity Time: 20 to 30 minutes

Materials: Bible, bandages, fine-tipped permanent markers, and 3x5 cards

Help kids experience this lesson on forgiveness as they think about Jesus' suffering on our behalf.

Have preteens form a circle. Give kids each a marker and a 3x5 card, and ask them to think about the times they've been hurt by someone else's actions. As they think of those times, have them draw a symbol of the hurt on the 3x5 card.

Read aloud Matthew 6:14. Ask, "Why is it sometimes difficult to forgive someone who's caused you pain? Has someone else forgiven you for hurting him or her? Explain. How did it feel to be forgiven? How does it feel to forgive someone else?"

Have kids cross out the symbols that represent anyone they've honestly forgiven and count the remaining symbols. Give each preteen a bandage for each remaining symbol, and have kids write each symbol for a hurt they haven't yet forgiven on a bandage.

Form pairs. Have kids help each other put their own bandages on their faces, arms, and legs-wherever skin is exposed. Then have kids leave their bandages on for the remainder of the class.

Say, "These bandages remind us of those we haven't yet forgiven. It's true that the longer we wait to forgive someone, the harder and more painful it is for us. Jesus forgave all our sins and he tells us to forgive those who sin against us."

Just before class ends, have partners remove each other's bandages and pray together for a heart for forgiveness. Then thank God for forgiveness and for Jesus' great sacrifice.

Cheryl Little
Keansburg, New Jersey

You'll need 1/2-gallon cardboard milk cartons, poster board, scissors, construction paper, staplers, potting soil, grass seed, and plastic wrap. Begin this project one or two weeks before Easter.

Have kids cut milk cartons in half and cover them with construction paper. Cut a strip of poster board and staple the ends to opposite sides of the carton to form a basket handle.

Kids can decorate the outside of their baskets and then fill the containers with 2 inches of potting soil and a generous amount of grass seed. Let kids water the soil, cover it with plastic wrap, and place the container in the sun. When grass sprouts, remove the plastic wrap and let kids fill their baskets with wrapped Easter treats.

Read aloud Isaiah 58:11. Remind kids that just as they care for the grass in their baskets, God always cares for us.

Excerpted from Children's Ministry Magazine. Subscribe today!

Stuff: Talc-free baby powder, a plastic tub, and an activity area.

What to do: Empty containers of talc-free baby powder into a shallow tub. Tell kids when bees spread pollen, they gather it from one flower and then leave pollen prints everywhere they go after that. Kids can practice spreading pollen by taking off their shoes and socks and stepping into the tub of baby powder. When their feet are covered with powder, kids can run around so they see how their powder footprints spread. (Baby powder vacuums and sweeps up easily.)

Tell kids that just like a bee spreads pollen everywhere it goes, we can spread God's love everywhere we go, too.

Excerpted from Children's Ministry Magazine. Subscribe today!

Stuff: Various colors of tissue paper squares, resealable sandwich-size plastic bags, chenille wire, and wooden doll pins or wood clothespins.

What to do: Fill a bag with colorful tissue paper squares. Wrap a piece of chenille wire around the round top of the clothespin to create antennae, and push the bag through the slats of the clothespin to form wings. Remind kids that just as wings give butterflies the freedom to fly, Jesus freed us from our sins when he died on the cross and rose again on Easter morning.

Excerpted from Children's Ministry Magazine.

Stuff: Green paper plates (available at party supply stores or online at www.orientaltrading.com), construction paper, scissors, and glue.

What to do: Cut eight flower shapes from construction paper. Cut a slit in the center of each paper plate and then cut it in triangle slices like a pie. Bend the triangle shapes up to form leaves. Glue the flowers onto the tips of the leaves. Have kids talk about how their flower crowns are like and unlike the crown of thorns Jesus wore on the cross.

Excerpted from Children's Ministry Magazine. Subscribe today!

For some, the idea of quietly censoring the Bible has its appeal. And it's true: To a degree, simply leaving out the tough stories of the Bible would be easier. But-and this is a big "but"-children's ministers and experts all agree that omitting certain accounts of the Bible is a flawed approach that can result in children developing a flawed faith.

So what's the best approach to handling the racier events of the Bible? Read on to find out.

Unpack the Reality of Sin
Experts agree that we must figure out how to present all of the Bible-even the really uncomfortable parts-to kids so they learn from it. While the parts full of humanity's sin can feel treacherous with children, shielding them from these parts may in fact shield them from the awareness of our sinful nature and our need for a Savior.

"Most of the 'uncomfortable or censored' content is a direct result of sin," says Bill Emeott, lead childhood ministry specialist at LifeWay Christian Resources, "and kids need to understand what sin is and its consequences."

We can't teach the foundations of Christianity to children without teaching the concept of sin. Presenting the right teachings at the right time in a child's life can provide the building blocks necessary to establish initial understanding of who God is and who we are in relation to him through Jesus. Starting with the third story in the Bible, kids need to know how Adam and Eve's poor choice allowed sin to enter the world and separate humankind from God. It's important to not protect kids from an early and basic understanding of sin and its gravity. This knowledge is crucial for kids to understand more about the Bible, themselves, and the world around them.

"At the same time," Emeott notes, "it's important to be sensitive to a child's maturity and ability to understand the content. Whenever possible and appropriate, teaching the concepts and reality of these events is valuable-and foundational."

Use Age-Appropriate Discretion
If you've ever set out to read the Bible from cover to cover, you know how overwhelming it can be to stomach all the violence. The Bible brings humans' true sinful nature to the surface in a multitude of ways. Our challenge is to simplify-but not dumb-down-these lessons for children.

"For instance, the central story of our faith includes a guy being beaten, bloodied, and nailed to a cross," says Mikal Keefer, senior writer for Lifetree Café (lifetreecafe.com) and a children's ministry volunteer for more than 30 years. "Yet we find a way to share that story with everyone from young children to adults; it's not the story-it's the detail and method by which it's shared."

"I believe the entire Bible-every word-is important and good to study," explains Jayne George, children's ministry director for Valley Springs Presbyterian Church in Roseville, California. George has taught children and authored curriculum for more than 30 years. "The real question is: What's an age-appropriate way?"

One tactical example is in nearly every boy's favorite Old Testament "bad guy" story: David and Goliath. It's a safe assumption that in virtually no children's Bible is there mention of the end of the struggle, where David, after mortally wounding Goliath with his slingshot and stone, runs to Goliath, pulls the giant's sword, and makes the final kill by beheading him. The complete account may be okay for older preteens, but certainly not for preschoolers or early elementary kids.

"The Bible is by nature a violent book," Keefer continues. "Pick any child's Bible storybook and no matter how carefully the stories are told, there's violence lurking just around the corner."

Often simplifying certain aspects of a story and presenting them on the child's level is the key to making the story understandable to children. Consider the story of Noah's Ark. It's a treasured scene that adorns nurseries in churches and homes. What we don't see is that once the animals are aboard the ark, a devastating flood engulfs the rest of life. We leave out certain details for the little ones.

"It's a good idea to focus on the parts of the story that make a powerful connection with kids," says Jody Brolsma, senior editor for Group's vacation Bible school programs (groupvbs.com). "For example, in our Egypt VBS, we wanted to talk about Joseph being in prison for something he didn't do. We knew that kids understand what it's like to get blamed for something they didn't do or even to get punished unjustly. Well, Joseph was put in prison because Potiphar's wife tried to seduce Joseph, then claimed that he'd tried to rape her…Not exactly kid-friendly! So we had Joseph say, 'Potiphar's wife wanted me to be her boyfriend…and that's not right!' This was a simple, age-appropriate way to handle the topic, while not making it the focus of the story or an inappropriate distraction."

Build a Simple Foundation
Consider what the key truth is that children of any age need to learn from any Bible story. Keefer asserts, "I wonder if a better question to ask-rather than 'What stories are age-appropriate?'-might be 'What truth does God want these children to discover from his Word?'"

For many, removing unnecessary and overly complicated details from stories is one tried-and-true way to get the story to the child's level. Greg Baird is the founder of Kidmin360 (kidmin360.com), an organization that provides equipping and leadership development for children's ministers. He says his trusted approach to tough biblical topics is to share the truth-without sharing all the facts.

"Keep to the truth and the essential message of the passage, but be careful not to raise disturbing and distracting elements of the story," advises Baird. "For example, we can say that Rahab was a woman who didn't obey God rather than that she was a prostitute. As kids get older, we share more details. In fact, later on those details sometimes lead to more relevant, life-impacting discussions."

Children's minister George adds that teaching young children is an organic process, meaning she inserts story details to kids' learning as they're appropriate to the kids' age and development. "If I'm going to teach my child to swim, I'm not going to throw him into the deep end and hope he 'gets it.' I'm going to introduce him to water in an age-appropriate and organic manner. This way, children learn in non-threatening and easy ways. And that's your goal for teaching children the Bible. By the time they get to the more difficult details and stories, there's not trauma."

Don't Turn Truth Into a Fairy Tale
While simplifying biblical accounts to make them appropriate and palatable to children is beneficial, experts agree that there's a risk of over-sanitizing the stories: The stories risk being stripped of their inherent meaning and value.

"Children's ministers need to be willing to push the envelope a little," says Brolsma. "Many times it feels like we've watered down these stories so they're the equivalent of fairy tales in an effort to not frighten or offend. No wonder so many young adults who grew up in the church don't believe the Bible is true. We need to be willing to help children experience God's Word, to let the emotion and power of God's Word take root in a child's heart. That's life-changing. Again, I'm not talking about showing The Passion of the Christ to a class of fourth graders, but it's okay to talk about how painful it was for Jesus to die."

Providing kids with just enough detail to identify and relate to the people or situations involved in the events is extremely valuable. Ask: What traits or themes do you want to teach? How do you want your children to relate their personal experience to God's Word? And, advise our experts, don't be lulled into sticking to the tried-and-true stories kids have heard hundreds of times.

"Why have we limited the awesomeness of God's Word to a select number of 'safe' stories?" challenges Brolsma. "Recently we talked to VBS leaders about our upcoming Babylon VBS, which has the subtitle, 'Daniel's Courage in Captivity.' I was astounded that a negative comment was, 'How are you going to make the story of Daniel in the lion's den last for five days of VBS?' Daniel did so much more than face lions! If we could look at things through the filter of 'what truth does God want these children to discover from his Word?' I think we'd be shocked by the lesser-known Scriptures we could bring to life for kids."

Build on Basics
The best course of action for children's ministers is to start simply and build upon repeated concepts as children develop. Teaching fundamental concepts first and adding to these as maturity allows makes perfect sense.

"Children learn best when they're allowed to build on knowledge they've already got," says Emeott.  "Children learn difficult concepts a little at a time and build on what they know. A first-grade teacher doesn't start math lessons with algebra, but by the sixth grade, algebra is part of the expected teaching plan. Math starts with addition and subtraction and then kids build on those learned skills with multiplication and division. Eventually, the learner is ready for the more complicated math of algebra."

The same theory applies with controversial concepts of the Bible. "As a child matures and grows, you can share more and more facts with deeper understanding of the events," says Emeott. "God wants to speak anew every time you read his Word. So even in Bible stories we think we understand fully, God can reveal new and fresh truths."

• • •

When we look at the amazing array of events in the Bible, it's all too easy to lean toward censoring the ones that make us uncomfortable. Rather than censoring or omitting, change your frame of reference. Everything in the Bible is there for a reason; it's up to us to seek out the ways to help kids find the meaning God has for them in his words. Rather than censor it, we can simplify concepts and de-select details so they don't become a distraction to the understanding kids can get from the basic story. Learn to release and hold back just the right amount for the kids you minister to.

"Should we censor the Bible?" ponders Brolsma. "Of course not. But we should use wisdom as we teach God's Word, gleaning applicable and meaningful truths from every portion of Scripture. It means we step out in faith, sharing God's Word honestly and simply in ways that today's kids can best understand."

Lauren Hunter is a freelance writer, a church technology consultant (lhpr.net) and the founder of the blog Church Tech Today (ChurchTechToday.com). She and her husband have four children and live in Roseville, California.

In This Issue of Children's Ministry Magazine:Jan./Feb. 2012

FEATURES

Children's Ministry Impact on Your Church
Exclusive, hot-off-the-presses research that'll rechart your thinking.


Debunking the Dropout Myth
Is it really true that nine in 10 teenagers  "graduate" from the faith after high school? A well-known researcher debunks this pervasive legend.


Good Byes
Rather than melting down when volunteers announce they're leaving, follow these three strategies to ensure you-and your valued
co-servants-finish well together.

Stop "Using" Teens in Kidmin
Move away from "using" teenagers to developing and empowering them.


Tough Talks With Parents
Practical ways you can learn to speak a parent's language-even with challenging conversations.


Peel Off Kids' Labels
Labels-the good, bad, or ugly-can hinder your ministry to children. Here's how to unstick those labels.


A Guide to Kids' Grief
Practical tips for effective ministry to children experiencing loss and grief.


Happy New You
11 great ideas to help kids live a God-centered year.

AGE-LEVEL INSIGHTS

Birth to 2
Ministry of comfort, Daniel rhyme, jump up, Lazarus, solid foundation.

Ages 3 to 5
Praying with preschoolers, put Zacchaeus in the tree, fly frenzy, preschool eyesight.


Ages 6 to 9
Games that teach, silly-mals, foot-finders teamwork, distracted kids.


Ages 10 to 12
The awkward years, blindfolded builds, running on thirsty, therefore go.

IDEAS

Reaching Out
Welcome new kids, feed the hungry, prayers for the world.


Family Ministry
Ministry to your pastor's family, eyes to see, sacred marriage.

Special Needs
The sound of music, a quiet place, 100 devotions, 100 Bible songs.

Discipline Q&A
Parents' refusal to acknowledge problems, disciplining children differently, asking a child not to come back?

Leading Volunteers
Volunteer vision chart, synchronized prayer, five keys for better meetings.

>>And much more...

From the Editor:

I went skiing with my daughter Abby recently-and I never fell. That's not a good thing.

Here's why. My thighs burned, my feet ached, and my entire body tensed. I wasn't having as much fun as I could've had, because I fear how awkward I look before, during, and after a fall. So "what people might think" robbed me of fun and skill improvement.

I thought later that day this is really a metaphor for my life. I avoid personal projects unless they have guaranteed success. I resist competitions I won't win. I play it safe.

And it made me wonder about you and your ministry. How often do you play it safe because failure might make you look stupid or gawky or downright miserable? Do you work ultra-hard to keep from falling because you haven't figured out how to get up afterward?

You think I'd be different since I work at Group and we're all about risk-taking and innovation. Just try it I hear a lot around here. In fact, we even celebrate our "top flops," because if we're not failing, we're not trying hard enough. But on a personal level, I can be risk-averse.

I've learned a few things about myself that could maybe help you, too. First of all, I'm afraid I've never gotten over that junior-high-age belief that everyone's looking at me. The truth is, they're just not. So maybe we need to get over ourselves.

Second, I may just have to lift some weights to strengthen my upper body so getting up doesn't feel so impossible when I fall. What do you need to strengthen to recover from a fall? Maybe it's your humility muscle, your sense of humor, or your ability to learn from failure.

Falling isn't fatal. In fact, falling can be a protection from skiing into trees. Perhaps failure in ministry is God's protection from running headlong into an out-of-bounds area. Just think of what we can learn about God in the midst of turning to him to pick us up, gather our equipment, and help us smile at ourselves.

I say we make 2012 the year we go all out, catch some air, and enjoy the scenery as we fly by. And when we fall (because we will), we celebrate that we're not playing it safe anymore.

Follow ChristineYJones on Twitter. On Facebook, join our fan group for Children's Ministry Magazine and become a CMMag Insider!

1. Check out this great infant to 2-year-old curriculum, Play-N-Worship for Babies
   - from Training Tips for Nursery in Age Level Insights 0 - 2
2. Purity resource for preteens and parents: Family Faith Celebrations, Family Faith Celebrations: Commitment to Purity.
   - from Emerging Romantic Interests in Age Level Insights 10 - 12
3. Learn more about quality, easy-to-use curriculum.
   - from Plan B.
4. Read our Church's Social Story for VBS
   - Ministry for All
   
5. Here are more details on starting a special needs ministry.
   • Meet My Son: /articles/meet-my-son
   • No Child Left Behind: /articles/special-needs-no-child-left-behind
     - from Ministry for All
6. Jesus cut-out template.
   - from Where's Jesus? in Easter Giveaways
7. Watch a video of "Where's Jesus" in action.
   - from Where's Jesus? in Easter Giveaways
   
   
8. Watch this video tutorial on how to make Easter lilies.
   - from Easter Lilies in Easter Giveaways
   

Help younger children understand that because of Jesus and the cross, mistakes that left a mark on our hearts are gone when we tell Jesus we're sorry and ask him to forgive us.

The Stuff: A white sheet, permanent markers, washable ink, and baby wipes

Experience It: Spread the sheet on the floor or table, and have children gather around the outer edges. Talk about how after Jesus died on the cross, they wrapped him in a special cloth similar to the sheet. Tell kids that Jesus died so we can accept his gift of forgiveness. When we do something wrong, we can tell him about it, say we're sorry, and then he forgives us so we don't have to worry about it anymore. Jesus takes that "sin" mark away.

Have children each use the washable markers to "paint" their finger and place their fingerprint on the sheet as a reminder that we all do things that make Jesus sad. Have adult leaders use the permanent markers to draw hearts around children's fingerprints and print the child's name under the heart. Then pray together, telling Jesus we're sorry for the things we do wrong and thank him for forgiving us. Remind children to look for the sheet on Easter Sunday, to see that the fingerprint stain they left inside the heart will be gone because Jesus defeated death on Easter morning.

Afterward, take the sheet home and wash it. The washable ink will disappear, leaving the hearts and names of each child. Drape the sheet over a cross on Easter morning as a reminder to kids of Jesus' forgiveness.

Excerpted from the March/April 2010 issue of Children's Ministry Magazine. Don't miss another issue, subscribe today!

There are many facets to family ministry-whether your church is embarking on a churchwide initiative, you're celebrating kids' faith milestones, or you're simply looking for small ways to incorporate families into what your ministry is already doing. We asked children's ministers for their best, most effective idea or insight for family ministry-and now we've compiled a potpourri of fantastic family ideas for you.

Family Worship Sunday
In the months that have five Sundays, the fifth Sunday is Family Worship Sunday. On that day, our senior pastor and I co-lead the sermon. I bring props, object lessons, and visuals, and we have kids sit up front. The pastor and I work together to create a service that's interesting and engaging for adults and the kids. We incorporate some of our typical children's ministry experiences and have everyone participate.

These special Sundays have been very effective at giving parents and other adults in the church a glimpse into what goes on in children's ministry. We've been able to increase our volunteer pool, see families get more involved at church and at home, and keep children's ministry in front of our congregation. One of the greatest things about Family Worship Sunday is our entire church sees how our pastor is onboard with children's ministry by opening the sanctuary for us to worship and learn together.
Lisa Messer

Volunteer Connections
Keeping in touch with families on a regular basis has been a key goal of our family ministry efforts. One of the best things we've done is have all our volunteers make a connection with families. We simply split our ministry kids among our children's ministry volunteer base. Each volunteer has about 10 kids. Volunteers make contact with the child's family every week. How they do it is up to the volunteers-they might send a card, pay a visit, make a phone call, or send an email. We just want families to know they're important to us, they have many friends here, and our ministry cares.
Lisa Messer

Family Fridge Frame
One great idea we've used with families is really simple but effective: Fridge Frames.
Kids decorate a simple 5x7 cardboard picture frame (available at craft stores) for their families and then attach a magnet to the back.

We let kids and parents know they can stick the Fridge Frame where the entire family can see it on the refrigerator. Each week we send home a new 5x7 card with the week's verse or Bible point we're studying printed on it. We encourage families to simply read the verse together at breakfast or dinner. This simple practice has been really effective at sparking faith discussions in families and helping kids and their parents see how God's Word applies to life today.
Jeanne Madden

Creative Coffee Chatter
Several years ago our church created a space for people to buy coffee and bagels. A great side effect of this mini Starbucks-like atmosphere has been that the small coffee nook creates significant opportunity for connections.

You don't have to build a mock-Starbucks to pull this off. Consider sprucing up your current coffee nook or repurposing your current coffee cart with intentionality. It's as easy as creating opportunities for you to sit with parents over coffee and have conversation around the start or end of a service time. Parents know that I'll be around for coffee before and after our children's programming. Here's the short list of topics I rely on, sometimes planned, sometimes off-the-cuff.

• Get Acquainted
  We serve many parents who we really don't know. Engage in simple conversation to get to know them better, with no agenda except finding out more about who they are as individuals. When you know more about parents, you'll be able to serve them and their kids better.
• Get "Fresh Eyes"
  Parents can give you valuable insight, observations, and opinions about what they see and feel in your ministry-and will be more willing to do so over a cup of coffee. Ask for their views and really listen, and you'll find they're empowered to share ideas often. It's guaranteed you'll get ideas to fine tune your ministry.
• Give Support
  Use these coffee moments to offer ideas and resources for parents. For example, introduce a program such as Kid Unique (Group) that's designed to help parents learn about being spiritual leaders or ways to parent from a Christian perspective.
• Give Ministry Updates
  Inform parents of upcoming events and dates in your ministry. Let them know how your summer camp fundraising is going. Talk about what kids are doing now. This casual update is a great way to keep parents in the loop and invite their thoughts on what your ministry is doing and where it's headed.
• Give Recruiting a Chance
  I saved this for last. Rather than going in with a list of positions you need filled, continually keep the mindset that in the course of these coffee conversations, you may uncover an interest in serving or a hidden talent. I've found that this is often an unexpected bonus of investing a few minutes of friendly conversation with parents.
  Jay Hostetler
  

No-Miss Family Experiences
When you talk to families today, they all describe their lives as busy, busy, busy. So adding more to their already-crazed schedules usually leads to low attendance for events.

We struggled with this in our church, and eventually decided to try the idea of scheduling our family events during regular children's programming rather than during additional times. For these once-per-month or once-per-quarter special experiences, we combined classes to form one large group and invited families. We've done a range of things, including guiding families through a learning experience of multiple touch-points such as a Bible story experience, a family prayer space, a guest speaker or artist, crafts and activities, and of course, snacks.

This approach has let us create several big "wow" experiences on a Sunday morning when families have already set aside this time to be together at church.

There have been several other benefits, too. Families love these special Sundays, they invite their friends, and our ministry team is energized (rather than drained) by the change of pace. Last-and best of all-families actually come to the events we work so hard to pull off.
Jay Hostetler

All-Inclusive Date Night
One of our ministry's most successful and impactful family ministry ideas is so simple: date nights. We do the typical father/daughter and mother/son date nights, but here's the twist: We invite all ages. The point is, we want younger kids and families to see examples of older generations who love God and love fun. I can't even begin to express what a blessing it is to see a 65-year-old woman bring her 85-year-old father to a date night. It sets an incredible example to the younger dads and their daughters. We provide simple appetizers and a brief devotion, and then send everyone out on their own dates while providing free childcare for parents with little ones left behind. The cost is very low for our ministry, but the outcome is amazing.
Annie Willems

Jeanne Madden is a children's minister in Baltimore, Maryland; Lisa Messer is a children's pastor in New Haven, Connecticut; Jay Hostetler is a children's ministry consultant in Holland, Michigan; and Annie Willems is the director for Calvin's Hats (calvinshats.com) in Salem, Oregon.

Excerpted from the March/April 2012 issue of Children's Ministry Magazine. Don't miss out on another issue, subscribe today!